I know a secret.
In less than 40 hours, I return to my adult life. The life I lead without rebellion, without youth, without blithe. This is not my secret. My secret will do two simultaneous things to my carriage. It will pour a heaviness on my shoulders. Simultaneously I will glide as if half my bodyweight has been left behind. It is an emotional slither that I can only gain after orgasmic moments. I will be walking through mud, but without disdain. How often can you glide through mud?
When I accepted this adult role, no more than 8 months ago, I unfastened my youth from my waist. Everything I had said I was, I no longer was. I had no idea the power of denial was so strong. Where did my ideals go? I remember now.
I remember now who I am. I remember the beauty in life, what makes one glide through the mud. I remember that part of myself that I liked. She ain’t so bad. The girl who walks with a smile that hides a secret no one knows. A secret she will share because there is always room for love.
Take a sip of this refreshing wine and feel what I say. I will always make room for love.
I feel with you, I really do. You have had to walk through the mud just like I have. Your feet get heavy, you end up looking like shit. Not to mention you’ll feel humiliated if you dwell on it. I am begging you to reconsider. Mud washes off. You can scrape your shoe along the pavement and scuff it off your person. Take the pain and play in the mud. You’ll stink, you’ll need a shower, you’ll get yourself dirty, discouraged, and dominated. Wouldn’t it be more worth the hassle if you found yourself empowered and alive? I swear to you, it can be done. Please please do it, enjoy yourself.
